Through out this project, I only had one question in mind, what have I learned?

Mexican Heaven By José Olivarez

Mexican Heaven by Jose Olivarez

all of the Mexicans sneak into heaven.
St. Peter has their names on the list,
but the Mexicans haven’t trusted a list
since Ronald Reagan was president.

St. Peter is a Mexican named Pedro, 
but he's not a saint. Pedro waits at the gate 
with a shot of tequila to welcome 
all the Mexicans to heaven,
but he gets drunk 
& forgets about the list. 
all the Mexicans walk into heaven, 
even our no-good cousins who only 
go to church for baptisms & funerals. 

all the Mexican women refuse to cook or clean
or raise the kids or pay bills or make the bed or
drive your bum ass to work or do anything except
watch their novelas, so heaven is gross, the rats
are fat as roosters & the men die of starvation.

Saint Peter lets Mexicans into heaven
but only to work in the kitchens.
a Mexican dishwasher polishes the crystal,
smells the meals, & hears the music.
they dream of another heaven,
one they might be allowed in
if they work hard enough.

there are white people in heaven, too.
they build condos across the street
& ask the Mexicans to speak English.
i'm just kidding.
there are no white people in heaven.

tamales, tacos, tostadas. tortas.
pozole. sopes. huaraches. menudo.
horchata. jamaica. limonada. agua.

Jesus has a tattoo of La Virgen De Guadalupe
covering his back. turns out he's your cousin
Jesús from the block. turns out he gets reincarnated
every day & no one on earth cares all that much.

It turns out god is one of those religious Mexicans
who doesn't drink or smoke weed, so all the Mexicans
in heaven party in the basement while god reads
the bible & thumbs a rosary. god threatens to kick
all the Mexicans out of heaven si no paran
con las pendejadas, so the Mexicans drink more
discreetly. they smoke outside where god won't
smell the weed. god pretends the Mexicans are reformed.
hallelujah. this cycle repeats once a month. amen.

Survival by Miguel Algarin

the struggle is really simple
i was born
i was taught how to behave
i was taught how to accommodate-
i resisted being humanized
into feelings not my own-
the struggle is really simple
i will be born
i will not be taught how to behave
i will not make my muscles vestigial
i will not digest myself

I am Including a three videos with descriptions that explain the way they are connected with the peom, Mexican Heaven by Jose Olivarez.

America is the “heaven” Mexican people go to when they go to “heaven.” José Olivarez’s poem, Mexican Heaven, states that “all Mexicans sneak into heaven.” “All Mexicans” are the generation of latino/a(s) who go into America searching for a better life. A better life usually means working in jobs that are professional to most upper class in our society. Those generations work hard to help their families. Those generations also produce Mexican Americans, the people who can change history and make a difference because just like the poem Survival by Miguel Algarin “[we] will be born” and “[we] will not be taught how to behave.” In other words, Mexican Americans will still grow with the Mexican culture they inherited from the past generations. All the “tamales,” the “tortas,” and “huaraches” that are passed on from generation to generation. Our culture will continue to live even after we go to “heaven.”

La Guera by Cherrie Moraga

I am including a voice audio below that explains the way I relate to the short story La Guera by Cherrie Moraga.

A Playlist for Kimberle by Achy Obejas

This is a spotify playlist that includes five songs that relate to the short story Kimberle by Achy Obejas. I include links to each song and explanations to the way they relate to Obejas’s story.

Melanie Martinez – Tag, You’re It/Milk and Cookies Double Feature 

At the end of the story, Kimberle and the main character find the “seasonal kill,” which was a dead girl. The girl was left to die alone and the only thing the main characters see is their reflection through the dead girl’s eye. I can not imagine the pain kidnapped women and girls experience. Melanie Martinez’s song, Tag You’re It, is about kidnapping. The words “tag, you’re it” is repeated throughout the song to emphasize a man picking out the girl they want next. The song then continues with the phrase, “can anybody hear me? Am I hidden underground?,” to signify that kidnapped women are alone when they are killed the same way the girl died in the story.

Baby don’t cut – Bmike [Official Music Video] – This song talks about suicde. If you are sensitive to these topics please do not watch. 

  In the short story Kimberle by Achy Obejas, the author reveals to us a character, named Kimberle, who struggles with suicidal thoughts. In the beginning of the story Kimberle says “[she] has to be stopped” (14). Later, Kimberle had a knife embedded “upright on the knuckles of her left” hand (19). These are subtle signals that a person is going through hardships in their lives that can not be explained. In that moment the main character took Kimberle to the hospital to get stitches. This is very similar to the song Baby don’t cut by Bmike. Bmike’s song talks about a girl who has “scars buried deep within her skin” because that is the way she “controls” the pain she feels. Bmike’s song explain suicide in a rap song that emphasize the suicidal thoughts can affect a person’s life. Kimberle represents the girl in Bmike’s song because they both experience suicidal thoughts.

If you are experiencing suicidal thoughts know that you are loved and wanted.

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline – 800-273-8255

Bad Bunny – Yo Perreo Sola 

Bad Bunny’s, Yo Perreo Sola, was a song that was needed in the Latino culture. Many Latino countries still experience machismo (masculine pride). In the video you can see the phrase “Ni Una Menos,” and this phrase is associated with the movement against gender violence. Bad Bunny’s song is also connected with the murder of a transgender woman in Puerto Rico. Bunny’s video also ends with the quote, “SI NO QUIERE BAILAR CONTIGO, RESPETA. ELLA PERREA SOLA,” and translated it means “if she does not want to dance with you, respect. She twerks alone.” This song reminds me of the moment the main protagonist calls herself and Kimberle “prey” (15). The word “prey” symbolizes the way women are sexualized and are put in awkward situations by mostly men. In the story, the main character talks about “two girls” who were “approached by a white man in his fifties” who “tried to grab one of them” (18). This is an example of the unsafe situations men can put women in. If a woman is uninterested in a man, then a man should “respect,” just as Bad Bunny states.

june – A Little Messed Up

The song, A Little Messed Up,  by June is intriguing because it talks about a person who claims they are a “little messed up” for being “selfish” and “obsessed.” In the story above, Kimberle seems to be a person with no fear as she “gunned the car” with the main character inside and for a moment “[they] were suspended in air and time” (21). Kimberle’s actions would be described as “a little messed” just like June’s song states. Kimberle was being selfish for speeding a car to make someone feel suspended in air can be dangerous and will increase adrenaline. The adrenaline of being alive is what made the main character respond with, “That was amazing … Just amazing” (22).

Kina – Get You The Moon (Official Video) ft. Snøw

The main character protagonist demonstrates to be the reason why “[Kimberle’s] head is still above water” (Kina). Kina’s song, Get You The Moon (featuring Snow), is an indie pop song that talks about how a person can make another person feel. The song reminds me that I have people who care for me and want me to live. I would also want to get the “moon” for someone who demonstrates they love me. In the case of the story, the main character brings Kimberle to live with her. Kimberle is supported and wanted by the main character because the main character brought Kimberle home and fed her (17). The main character is the reason why Kimberle’s head is “above water” (Kina). In other words, Kemberle is holding on to her life because the main character is always by her side. 

Dulce Pinzón and Graciela Iturbide

Children are usually naive and have little to no concern of what is going on the world around them. However, I was a little different according to my mom. My mother tells me that I was too curious as a child and that I always wanted to know more than what I could understand. I still remember all the stories she would tell me of when she was a child. Sometimes we still talk about them. 

My mother tries to be as descriptive as possible when she tells me what her home in Mexico was like because I was never able to visit it. According to her it was a field that had some aspects of a dessert and that she called a monte (sometimes a campo). The land naturally had trees with fruit. There were Cactus that produced pitayas, or dragon fruit. However, this environment was also a home to wild animals and reptiles, such as scorpions and snakes. My mothers description resembles the image of Gabriela Iturbide and the gray scaled image allows me to reminisce on the stories my mom would tell me of her home. Iturbide’s is the reality of what some people call a home in Mexico because poverty exists. On the other hand, the image can resemble la frontera (the border) that some people have to cross. Dulce Pinzón’s image makes me recall the story of Saint Juan Diego. I grew up with catholic moralities and I did learn many stories from the bible. In Dulce Pinzón’s we see Saint Juan Diego in a white cloth, with Virgin Mary designed on it, holding flowers. Pinzón’s image shows Saint Juan Diego and in the biblical story he meets Virgin Mary on the Tepeyac hill which was a monte that is similar to the environment shown in Iturbide’s image. Both images are connected to Mexico, a country of pride. Iturbide’s image reveals a home to many Mexicans, and the place that people will walk through for a better life. Pinzón’s image shows Saint Juan Diego, a saint that met Virgin Mary on the hill Tepeyac and now her image is on a cloak in the Basilica of the Lady of Guadalupe in the City of Mexico. 

Alternative ending for Porcupine Love by Tatiana de la Tierra

When I got home all I could think of was Antenita. The least thing I wanted was to hurt her. But what else can I do? What else can a person do when they are afraid of exposing every part of themselves. People are weak when they are vulnerable. It is difficult to love and reveal the most intimate sides of you. People can abuse your kindness and love. I was afraid that would happen to me. I shut myself inside when ever I tried to love. I was afraid of being hurt and as a result I isolated myself from Antenita years ago. She is not my biggest regret. She is my biggest enjoyment this life could have offered me. I was infatuated with every part of her: Her curves, her visage, her aroma, her personality, her everything. Every corner of her body drove me insane. Now I realize that I do miss her. Not only does my soul yern for her but my body as well. She makes me feel warm inside, wet, and I can’t help it anymore. I need her with me. And from the looks of it, she needs me too.

I can not wait any longer. I have to see her.

Wait. What am I saying? Am I not afraid any more? Of course I am. I am still frightened by the idea of being hurt. The moment I let people too close to and turn away. But, what about Antenita? Antenita makes me feel different. I feel safe with her. I feel that I can put trust on her, even if it’s hard. I now know that I love Antenita. That word, “love,” I never expected for that word to ever come out of me. To think that I can finally say that because that is how I truly feel, lets me know that Antenita is who I want to be with.

Fuck the spikes in my soul. I will pluck every single spike if I have to. I just want to love Antenita. I want to caress her. I want kiss her. I want to hear her melodic voice when I arouse with my fingers in her.

Later that night, I emailed her to tell her that I booked tickets to see her. Now I am sitting alone by the window fantasizing of all the ways I will pleasure her and of all the ways I will demonstrate to her that I love her. In a few minutes I received an email back from Antenita. All It stated was the simple phrase:

I love you.

At that very moment, EVERYTHING changed for me. I knew then and there that after all these years Antenita was meant to be with me.

An Article that realtes to the short story Pandora’s Box by Arturo Arias

Below is a link to a New York Times article and an explanation of the way the article relates to the short story Pandora’s Box by Arturo Arias.

Why Are Men Still Explaining Things to Women?

Throughout history women were always deemed fragile and emotionally unstable for society. Today women have proven, more than ever, that  they are strong and independent beings capable of accomplishing anything they set their minds to. The short story, Pandora’s Box by Arturo Arians, tells the story of a boy named Juan who becomes a woman and goes through many of the experiences women face. The moment Juan became a woman, his intial thoughts were of sex and this reminded me of the way women are constantly sexualized and judged in our society. The story is mainly through a boy in a woman body’s  point of view and I was intrigued by this because the only word I thought of was “mansplaining” (I am not stating that the story itself is mansplaining). On page 34, Juanita (Juan’s woman name) is confronted by a man who tells her “[B*tch]! If you were a man I’d punch you right in your face.” The man’s vulgar language reminds of the way men will mansplain to patronize women. Mansplaining is a common experience that women will face to feel patronized. In the article Why Are Men Still Explaining Things To Women by Mary Katharine Tramontana, Tramontana explains that mansplaining is connected to the “idea that women are incapable of being authority figures.” Many men have this audacity to explain and interrupt women with the assumption they have no idea about a topic or themselves. The assumption that women aren’t knowledgeable is connected to the short story when Juan/Juanita has no idea what “burning eyes on your skin” feels like (30). Women experience certain aspects in life that will probably not comprehend and men experience their own aspects in life that women won’t understand either. It is true that women and men will never relate to each other, but I hope one day both can reach an understanding.

What Have I learned

Melanie Martinez – Orange Juice [Official Music Video]

Through out this project, I have learned to embrace myself for being a woman and a Latina. I am a Mexican American female, a Chicana. At first I was ashamed of being Chicana because I felt that neither Mexico or America would accept me. I was always too American for Mexico and too Mexican for America. Now I came through an epiphany. Being a Chicana/o is a culture of its own that combines the customs of two cultures. My culture is unique in its own way and I should not belittle it. The quote “Your body is imperfectly perfect Everyone wants what the other one’s working” is from a song called Orange Juice by Melanie Martinez. Melanie her self is Dominican and Puerto Rican. Many of her songs illustrate many topics that society faces. This song talks the struggles of bulimia some women face. The quote presented above emphasizes that every body is perfect in its own way and there will be other women who will admire your body. This quote can also be used to symbolize that every culture is beautiful and there will be others who will admire your culture. I understand that every aspect of my culture is important. The music, the religion, the art, and the food play a role to build a unique culture. In every Latino culture, many families came from Latino countries to have a better life in America. This created many new cultures. Puerto Rican American, Mexican America, Ecuadorian American, and other forms of Latino/a American are cultures that allow a person to enjoy the best f two different worlds. All Latino/a Americans should stand proud that we can stand on two different lands. I have come to an acceptance with myself.

I learned that there is not other culture like mine, and that there is no other person like me. (This goes for all cultures/ people and does not invalidate others)

I AM PROUD TO BE A WOMEN. I AM PROUD TO BE MEXICAN. I AM PROUD TO BE AMERICAN. I AM PROUD TO BE A LATINA.

I AM PROUD TO BE CHICANA

Thank you for reading, Mariel Hernandez.